I leaned my head back and let my mind idle. That didn't work out so well. Fat, nasty thoughts with swollen bellies crept out from under the rocks and began whispering, "You're a cripple. You're a cripple" or "You're going to die!" I didn't mind the dying taunts. The cripple ones I could have done with out. I gave up. I looked out the window and was watching the passing nothing when Kat slid into the empty space next to me. She didn't say anything. She just held out her hand, opened it, and I recognized the two yellow footballs on it. I took them, dry swallowed them, started choking, and drank from the water bottle she handed me.
I closed my eyes again. I was hoping she would go away. She didn't. I waited for a couple of minutes. I was going to have to get ready to go in about 20 minutes. I wanted to ride the Oxy until then. Not talk. Without opening my eyes I told her, "Usually when someone closes their eyes it means they want you to go away."
"That's not always true. You could just be sleepy."
She thought about that but she didn't move. Instead she said, "I know what you're going to do."
I opened my eyes and stared straight ahead. "I don't know what I'm going to do. It's kinda like how I lead my life. So you don't know."
She didn't argue. Instead she said, "Look at me."
I looked at her and she kissed me hard on the lips and whispered, "Goodbye. You were the best."
"Were?" Echoed in my head. I banished it. I didn't have time to dwell on shit like that right now.
I went back to watching nothing roll past and what kind of load out we'd need.